This week I started the Slim-Fast diet. Am I perfect? NO. I wish I was but I think I have an eating disorder. It may sound crazy but I believe I have Binge Eating Disorder.
According to the Mayo Clinic:
Binge-eating disorder is a serious eating disorder in which you
frequently consume unusually large amounts of food. Almost everyone
overeats on occasion, such as having seconds or thirds of a holiday
meal. But for some people, overeating crosses the line to binge-eating
disorder and it becomes a regular occurrence, usually done in secret.
When you have binge-eating disorder, you may be deeply embarrassed about
gorging and vow to stop. But you feel such a compulsion that you can't
resist the urges and continue binge eating. If you have binge-eating
disorder, treatment can help.
I know it sounds crazy but that is me almost to a "T". In public with strangers I won't eat NEARLY as much as I would at home when nobody is home. I even do it with my husband there but not as much as otherwise. I always say I will stop and control how much I eat but that never works.
For example:
Yesterday I followed my slim-fast plan like I was supposed to: Shake for breakfast, fruit snack, shake for lunch, slim-fast bar for snack, then a healthy choice dinner. What did I do when I got home? Had chips, dip, and ice cream. NO BUENO.
I have a wedding coming up in April 2014. I can't fit in any of my clothes and anything my size is "old lady" style. I'm tired of it but can find a ton of excuses on why not to exercise or eat right. I actually almost wrote an excuse after that "but" in the previous sentence.
The exercise is the hardest. I work 70-80 hours a week, on average. I have down time at my job but it is still difficult to get motivate to work out. I just don't. I can think of all sorts of reasons.
You would think trying to get pregnant and be healthy would motivate me. But it doesn't. I just say I'll be good when, and if, that day ever comes.
I can think of reasons to be motivated but none of them have done the trick this time.
But I'll start with trying to just lose some weight with the slim-fast plan.
1 comment:
Good luck with the Slim Fast plan! I can relate on the binging :(
And I know what you mean about you would think TTC would motivate you, but it doesn't. For me, emotionally it becomes too much and I can't focus on them both. Food is comforting to me, and I struggle with that a lot- especially when TTC.
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