MUST get out of this FUNK!

My funk is really bad. Not smell, lol!

I think I am working my way out of it:::

Step 1: Proper study time for a test. Even recorded my notes on my phone so I could listen to them while cleaning.

Step 2: Start back up on the treadmill. I did 60 mins Monday and 60 mins today. I may not get to do it again until Friday, but that is probably already more than I have done all year!

Step 3: DIET. I am in the 190s again. I vowed not to go back up there once I was in the 180s and I failed myself. And I'm at the point in my weight for 5 lbs will make a TREMENDOUS difference on how my jeans fit... right now I'm muffin' toppin'   :o(   I may not be able to start this until after we go grocery shopping for next week. But I think I am going to try the 17 Day Diet again but maybe not quite as extreme with the no carbs. I'm not regular enough to not have carbs/fiber.

Step 4: Regain my will power & self confidence. I think I am going to start finishing things that I have started or need to work on... Like the office/game room. And the crochet afghan I started when I was a teen and is in a box in the garage... almost done too!

I need to find someone or someones that are as dedicated as I am but with just as tight a schedule that we can keep each other motivated and on track. IDK.

Wish me luck!

Need to Get in Control...

My weight this morning is 192. Granted, I've been enjoying food lately but that is a 12 lb increase since a month ago. I really need to focus on watching what I eat and finding a way to exercise more often. I wish I had an extra hour every day to do so. I may have to drop Facebook (dundundunnnnnnn). I'm sure that would free up some time too... Or I would just find another way to waste time on the laptop.

I need a buddy as determined as I need to be to lose weight. I don't really have one here...

Another Photo Comparison

Jeff and Me - Approx 250 lbs; May 2009

Me - approx 180 lbs - and Jeff; March 2011

Photo Updates

Remember the first post on here?

Well, I realized I have put a more recent photo since that one...

These are some of the most recent photos of me. They are from Julie's wedding.

Upper body shot

Julie (Bride) and me at her wedding

Frustrated

Do you ever hate who you can be but not enough to change it?

I'm not talking just physically, but mentally too.

I hate that I have no determination or will power.

I want to lose weight, but would rather be lazy than get on the treadmill. I know it won't fall off on its own (although that would be AWESOME!) and I know it will be a fight for the rest of my life.

I also know that I want to do really well in school, yet here I sit, procrastinating once again.

I want to keep a clean house but blame work and school and helping at Jeff's work as not having time to exercise or clean.

Let's be honest. Facebook. Computer period. And pure laziness are my downfalls.

I feel so hurried and busy that I don't even feel like I have time to exercise. Can I wake up earlier... yes... but who wants to do that??? I guess I should find the motivation to wake up earlier if it means losing weight. But I guess I just don't want it that bad enough. Then again, I go to try on new clothes and HATE how it fits...

How do you fix that?

I Need Help

I don't have the will power to do a strict diet by myself. Jeff needs a dory that gives him more energy to work his 18+ hour days.

I'm happy with my weight compared to what I WAS but know I want to be better. I just can't do it by myself. No matter how much I want it, I feel like I need a Jillian on my shoulder yelling at me!

I don't have any one really pushing me, and I'm not pushing myself.

ReDo

So, last week was not a good week on the diet. I cheated every day... Jeff... :)

SO. He promised that he would go Mon-Fri without cheating one time this week. He knows that if he cheats then I'll cheat.

SO. We are starting today at Day 6 on this 1st round of 17 day diet. Granted, that meant we ate REALLY bad this weekend so my weight is back up to 186.8. But I'm also on my period and have been eating crazier than I normally would.

Here goes!!

Huh????

Scale today says I gained 3.8 pounds! How the hell did I do that in one day???

I followed my diet about 98%. And worked from 830a-930p.

I made myself eat salads and chicken. Even at subway! Oh how I wanted that meatball sub....

Grrrrrrrrrrr